Honeymooners
by blueschist
Summary: Galahad's seen some shit.


this was written for the 2013 aveyond winter exchange on tumblr for Iz (whose url changes like the wind)

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><p>"Husband, where have you gone?" He heard her laugh, like it was some sort of<em> game,<em> and he shuddered from his hiding place in a clump of bushes behind the Sedonian manor.

"Do you not want to go on our honeymoon?" He'd rather go to hell.

If there was any consolation to it all, it was that as a vampire his scent was much harder for his new wife to track.

He could hear her getting further away, possibly so she could go look for him somewhere else in the city, and he thanked the gods for their mercy.

This was his chance, but he had nowhere to go. He couldn't go back to serving the kingdom he loved, not in this state, and seeing as how this state was rather permanent he was kind of… how you say… fucked. He certainly could never show his face in front of the Sedonian guard again, or ever even speak to his old friends there. He didn't even want to _be _in this city, for fear of someone recognizing his face. To have others knowing that he had become a slave to that… that demoness was beyond humiliating.

But-gah! How could this have happened? He, who had always been righteous and who had always tried his hardest in adhering to the rules the Gods made for humankind. For this to happen… he felt shame and regret, like he had failed the Gods, failed his king, and most of all failed his mother, who had taught him right from wrong. To think he'd have to carry this shame for years to come, possibly centuries… well, he didn't want to think about it.

Galahad went over his options. There were two of them: he could (no) submit (double no) to the _demon spawn_ (three thousand times no) as her (un)lawfully wedded husband, _or _he could board the next ship out of Sedona and maybe try to get himself out of this mess, somehow. One option.

The next day, he was gone. Te'ijal would later call this their 'honeymoon.'

...

It was two years later, and Galahad had probably been to at least eight libraries, trying to find _something _about a cure to vampirism. He had looked through every book he could find about monsters, ghosts, ghouls, and demons. He now knew way too much about centaur genitals, more than he ever wanted to know. He had the answers that nobody knew they wanted to questions that nobody knew to ask. "If a female werewolf has sex with a wolf while transformed, what species will her children be?"

He had looked through every book about vampires, and he was disappointed to find that over half of them weren't academic in any way. He couldn't recall the demon spawn _sparkling _and he certainly hoped that she couldn't stop time.

He had even –gods forbid– looked in books about _magic_. He knew it was silly, but maybe those fools with their smoke and mirrors and blasphemy had figured out a way to un-vampire someone without actually killing them. No such luck.

If holy water didn't burn so much, Galahad would have needed to make several trips to the local temple just to wash away the sinful imprint of all the garbage he had read. He _needed _to find a way out so that he could continue with his life—he wanted to go back to serving the King, he wanted to check up on his mother. His youngest brother had still been a squire the last time he saw him, he had probably become a knight already, and Galahad hadn't been there for that.

...

It was a bright day in one of the warm summer months, and Galahad was preparing to board a ship to some distant city or another. It was still another two hours before departure, but there was nothing wrong with being early.

He stopped in the shade to reapply his sunscreen. From the corner of his eye, he caught a glimpse of something shockingly red in the distance, and he froze. He could recognize that shade of red anywhere.

Luckily, the devil spawn didn't seem to see him, and he watched her wander away with the crowd. How did she know he was here? Had she guessed, or had someone told her? Whatever it was, he was extra careful when he finally boarded his ship, and he made sure that she wasn't among any of the passengers. Sure, he got some weird looks when he sprinted from crowd to crowd, and he probably didn't endear himself to anyone when he demanded to see the roster of ship passengers, but as his mother used to say "better safe than sorry."

...

It was ten years later, and Galahad liked to imagine that his youngest brother was serving the King in his stead. His brother held a lance in his hand and was wearing the emblem of the royal family. He stood at the King's right side. Galahad imagined that they had forgotten about him.

Galahad missed his family. Galahad missed garlic bread and daily prayer. He missed when eating meat rare was a choice and not a dietary necessity. He missed Sedona but he hadn't aged at all in the past twelve years and he couldn't go back and still be the same Galahad.

...

It had been seventy years, and the last time he checked, his brother was dead. The King had been assassinated years ago, and Sedona had since broken apart into many smaller city-states. If Galahad had stayed there, then he was sure this wouldn't have happened.

It was ten years ago when he found out about the King's death, and he felt that all the events that occurred up to that point in his life happened solely to make him give up. He had been a pious man, and he had tried to continue being a pious man, but virtue became less and less rewarding with every bit of hope he lost. He was tired, everyone he cared about was dead, and there was no chance of him ever going back to the life he once had. There was no point.

The next time the hellspawn found him, he didn't bother trying to escape.

...

It was two hundred years later and Galahad was lying next to the demon spawn he called his wife, wondering how he had come to peace with how much he hated himself.

He stared straight ahead at the opposite wall. "Did you know that if a shifted female werewolf has sex with a dog and becomes pregnant, her children will be dogs, even if she gives birth to them in her human form?" he said blandly.

Te'ijal stared at him for a moment before smiling. "Oh husband, how you flirt."


End file.
